


Holding On

by QueenCarol



Series: Fighting For The Moments [11]
Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Carzekiel, Episode tie-in, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-09
Updated: 2020-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:08:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23076805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenCarol/pseuds/QueenCarol
Summary: She feels alive.  For the first time since Henry was murdered Carol feels like she’s living, like she can take a breath without her body and soul exploding in pain, without feeling guilty for having lived longer than he did.  She knows it’s all because of Ezekiel.
Relationships: Ezekiel/Carol Peletier
Series: Fighting For The Moments [11]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1167233
Kudos: 10





	Holding On

**Author's Note:**

> Carol Peletier, Sophia Peletier, King Ezekiel, Henry, Jerry, Shiva, and any other recognizable character or plot of The Walking Dead belong to AMC Network and Skybound Entertainment, Image Comics and Robert Kirkman.
> 
> In no way is the author claiming ownage of any of the characters nor is there any economic/monetary gain at any time. The author is extremely respectful of the original creators and is willing to take down this work of fiction if requested.
> 
> No copyright infringement intended.  
> Original characters are the property of the author.

——  
Holding On  
——

She feels alive. For the first time since Henry was murdered Carol feels like she’s living, like she can take a breath without her body and soul exploding in pain, without feeling guilty for having lived longer than he did. 

She feels happy. It may only last as long as she’s in this room but she finally feels something other than grief and anger. She’s even able to tease Ezekiel after saying she had left her sense of humor back at Kingdom.

She feels hopeful despite finding out the love of her life has cancer, despite all she’s gone through in her blinded attempts of getting rid of Alpha, despite possibly losing her best friend.

She knows all of it is because of the man that now sits besides her, giving her an almost shy smile as if they hadn’t just finished having sex. 

Ezekiel has a way of making her see clearly, of centering her and seeing through all the layers of pain her soul carries. It scares her, it humbles her, it is the reason she had to leave all those months ago. She couldn’t have released all the anger she had inside, all the anger she needed in order to get rid of that woman, if he was at her side. It would simply be impossible.

The moment she had heard Earl say that this could be their last moments alive, Carol had known she needed to see Ezekiel. She needed to tell him how wrong she had been to leave him, needed to tell him how much she loved him, how grateful she was for their years together. She hadn’t meant for it to grow physical that quickly, she had wanted to simply be with him and talk to him. One thing had led to another and the knowledge that he was in pain and suffering had floored her. She wanted to take it all away even though she knew she couldn’t, even though she knew she was partly to blame for it.

The thought of losing him was too much to bare. It had broken through the last of her shields. It had stripped her of all her bravado and left her simply being Carol; the woman in love, the woman that was loved, the woman that wasn’t broken. She had made love to him just like they had done all those times back at home and it had been as sweet and fulfilling as it was then.

She’s not ready to leave his side, though, so she clutches their clasped hands against her belly to let him know. He squeezes her hand, her sock caught between their palms and she shifts on the bed until she’s close enough to rest her head on his shoulder.

“We aren’t dying tonight.” She states.

“Carol...”

“We aren’t,” she repeats as she leans back just enough to look at him directly without losing the contact of her head on his shoulder. “We can’t. We have unfinished business. You and I... this isn’t goodbye.”

He lets out a tiny grunt before shifting. Slowly he lays back, pulling her with him. They lay on the bed a little awkwardly so Carol adjusts herself besides him, her head on his shoulder, his arm around her. The sock is forgotten but their hands quickly find their way back together. 

“You better not die.” She warns him. 

“I will do my absolute best.” He promises before placing a kiss to her forehead. “Wouldn’t want to make you mad.”

She chuckles before burying her face against his naked skin. She nuzzles against him before pressing a kiss to his pectoral. “What you said... about me at least remembering you fondly for the sex... the great sex...”

“I was kiddi-“

“I know.” She interrupts him. “But it’s not true. It’s not just the sex-“

“The great sex.” He teases.

Carol smiles but continues, correcting herself as she goes. “It’s not just the great sex, we had a life, we had happiness, we had everything.”

“We had everything.” He choruses in agreement before pressing another kiss to her forehead.

She tilts her head again and raises a hand to gently caress his chin, guiding his gaze to hers. She needs to see into his dark eyes when she says this, she needs him to know that she means it without a shadow of a doubt. “We had love.” She reminds him. “No, that’s not true; we have love.”

His eyes fill with tears, tears he cannot hide from her. Her thumb moves back and forth over his chin and cheek. She has missed this intimacy, she has missed him and their love more than she ever thought possible. God, how she loves him. 

Tenderly she guides him towards her until their lips press together. She takes her time in kissing him, opening her lips so that they can lose themselves in each other once again. He kisses her, steals her breath instantly and she’s more than willing to let her lungs burn for air if it means being close to him again. Her leg smooths over his, her hips opening to welcome him against her. His hand smooths down her back just as his other hand lets go of hers only to place it on her hip and pull her closer.

She can feel the desire re-ignite within her, within him. She’s unable to resist it, giving herself once more to their feelings, pressing tightly to him as her hands dance over his skin, as she pulls him tight against her. He twists them until he hovers above her, his hand sliding between the layers of her clothes and her skin. A shiver runs through her when he finally touches the trembling skin of her belly and continues to wreck havoc on her body as he divests her of her clothes yet again, piece by piece.

Her body welcomes him again as he sinks into her. They fit like two very different pieces of a puzzle. They are made for each other. Her jagged lines against the smoothness of his curves. His hips move and hers follow as her thighs tighten around his hips, as her arms wrap around his back. She never wants to let him go, she never wants to leave this room and the mess of sheets and pillows. She would gladly stay here for the rest of their lives.

“I love you.” She whispers near his ear as they reach the pinnacle of their desire, as they unwind in each other’s arms and they shake uncontrollably with the strength of their release. “I love you, Ezekiel.”

This time they both remain in bed, holding on tightly and unwilling to let go even though they know there’s a whole world outside and a fight they must face.

When their limbs stop shaking, when their breathing has calmed and their bodies have cooled, she still holds him close, skin to skin. She can’t let go of him, she won’t. 

“We aren’t going to die tonight.” He agrees with her. “We have too much to live for, to much to fight for.”

“Too much to fix.” She adds. 

“And we will, somehow.”

She nods. She knows he is right. Somehow they will find their way back to what they had, a better version if it’s even possible. They will survive this fight, there is no doubt about it. She needs them to win. They will win.

“We will have everything.”

But first, they have a war to fight.

**Author's Note:**

> Who else believes this isn’t goodbye but the beginning of something beautiful?


End file.
